“Meagan! Get me the fuck out of the city!”
Elise’s voice drummed in her ear as Meagan squinted. “Damn sunlight...”
“WHAT?”
“Nothing, I said it’s too bright. I’m almost there! Where are you?”
Meagan could hear a scuffle and Elise’s breath quicken, and she slammed her foot on the gas even harder. “I have no idea!” Elise screamed.
“I’m coming! And I have Neosporin!”
She waited for Elise to fight off the giraffe hoard and escape outside to find a street sign. “Okay I’m at ninety three Tansley Avenue!”
“Oh that’s near where Steve lives...”
“FOCUS MEAGAN!”
“Right!” Meagan said, shaking off the image of her very attractive co-worker. “Okay just sit tight, I’m coming. Did you get a weapon?”
“Um, yeah, it’s a golf club...”
“Good!” Meagan shouted. “That’s good! Golf clubs are really sturdy. If they can damage a Lexus they can kill a giraffe.”
“A Lexus?”
“Tiger Woods. You know, it wouldn’t kill you to turn on TSN once in awhile...”
“You know I really don’t think this is the time to DISCUSS TELEVISION!”
Meagan swerved out of the way of a passing SUV and stared in horror at the driver. The middle aged man was being mauled to death by a tiny orange figure. “Elise I’m stepping on it. The giraffes are headed your way. They seem to have originated in the suburbs.”
“As most evil tends to do.”
“Okay don’t leave that street. I’m hanging up now, we should conserve battery life. I’ll be right there. And try to grab some chicken!”
“Some chicken?”
“For your cat. Cats can’t eat granola Elise.”
“...right...”
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Why are you leaving comments on a blog? Get your gun and go take out some flesh-eating giraffes before they-